Mumblings

We do have the weirdest weather in Manila. It can't seem to make up its mind.

It was a humid Monday night with barely a breeze in the air.

A very promising Tuesday, the morning sun promptly making its (heated) presence felt.

Midday, the sky turns dark, the mood downcast, the air cold. Minutes later, the heavy clouds give way.

An hour-long downpour.

Now, three hours later, I look out the window and the sun shows up again, drying up the puddles that muddied my floral shoes earlier (I just had to say that! Ha ha ha).

When I think about it, life mirrors today’s changing condition .…..

But I think it mirrors a woman’s mood swings even more.

(A woman speaketh). =D

Ignoring life's little pains

I twisted my left ankle several days ago. Just a minor thing, really. (as I am able to walk seconds after that “incident”)

Blame it on my 1.5 (or is it 2?) inch light brown shoes that provided little protection, if at all (but the shoes look very feminine and stylish..oh dear me...the price of vanity). Or maybe I can blame it on the sloped side road I was brave enough to walk on or maybe I am just innately clumsy. (I’ve always thought of myself as flat-footed because of the regular ‘slips’, but I am not. I just needed a plausible excuse)

I don’t feel any pain at all but just to give my poor ankles a rest, I put that pair of shoes aside.

Once in a while, to give my feet its much-deserved exercise, I do the usual stretches. Now I move it in a gentle and gradual circular motion… ouch! Did I just say I didn’t feel any pain? I take it back. My left ankle hurts.

It is not the kind of ache that needs a bandage, not the kind that would render me immobile, not the kind that would require me some pain relievers, not the kind that would hinder me from walking.

But it is there.

Ironically, I feel it when I am resting. I feel it when I touch the portion that bore my weight from that near-fall.

I am sure of two things:

It does not give me an excruciating ache, just a discomfort, a slight sting.
It does not hinder me from my regular routine.

In the meantime, how do I deal with it? What’s the best anesthetic?

Nothing. I just have to ignore it. When I do feel a semblance of pain, I endure it and simply walk it off.

See, there is one more thing I am certain of, this pain is temporary.

That is how I choose to deal with my little pains, be it from a sprained ankle or from something else.

I gripe

I have a messed up desk right now. Papers strewn all over the place. I remember agreeing to have a table smaller than what I should have in order to accommodate the other occupant of this room. It seemed spacious enough especially since I was given a very nice 19-inch flat panel. Now, I feel like saying, “I want that table back!”

Whew! Breath in, breath out. I steal a glance at Chris, my very mild-mannered, soft-spoken, nice looking roommate.....

...........

Okay, okay!. No more complaints.

This one is for you

We all have fixtures in our lives. They keep our days predictable and secure. And though sometimes, days become routine, fixtures make them bearable. Some fixtures, you will have your entire life, others, for a brief moment.

Yet no matter the length of time, fixtures leave happy and fond memories, memories that lift that corner of your lips to a happy smile.

For over a year, this fixture shared my passion for two important loves of my life - music and writing (a rare combination that this fixture shares with two others), among other many little things.

For over a year, it has entertained, educated and enlivened me. Over the last year, it has been exactly that, a fixture that decorated my shelf called life.

Now this fixture has left its usual place on my daily shelf. And though I feel a tinge of sadness and nostalgia, I am also filled with a huge amount of gratitude -- for the happy and carefree company.

This post is for you, James. My way of saying you were a daily fixture on my shelf that I will remember with fondness. And with great pride.

Here’s to your new and bloggable adventures! Cheers! (you’ll be saying a lot of that, I am sure!)

This thing called IFRS

It turned the financial reporting world upside down - International Financial Reporting Standards.

The international standards for accounting and auditing have been in existence since the 60s, serving as the rudder that steers the direction of the world of financial reporting. But these standards are by far reaching an unprecedented significance as the world moves closer towards international convergence.

One by one, countries from all over make the gradual and painful transition from their existing local standards to IFRS. Other countries are more prepared than others with their respective accounting standards council initiating revisions in their local standards to make it parallel to IFRS.

IFRS shook a portion of the standards’ foundations. I am not privy to the process that went with the finalization of IFRS but the powers that govern the finance world is autocratic. The Council draws up the details while the rest of us wait in anxious anticipation. Suffice to say, IFRS is geared towards fair market value reporting. The Standards also addressed the contentious ‘off-balance sheet’ items arising from derivatives. Off balance sheet no more!

As a corporation that sells financial information, my employer prepared well for the radical changes, making headway in product enhancements and database adjustments. Our production group and technology group had to be up to speed in order to provide subscribers with the latest and most updated information.

With some of the basic accounting rules revised or totally discarded, I had to do a lot reading and studying to ‘update’ myself. Some of my days are spent helping some non- accountants in the team understand the changes.

Change!!! It is all about change and how resilient we need to be. I remember that little (but expensive) book called Who Moved My Cheese. In the age of globalization, we can’t be complacent. We have a choice between becoming like a Hem or a Haw.

IFRS. It is the force that pretty much renders the latest editions of all accounting books obsolete.

A Certain Smile

How could I have forgotten Johnny Mathis in my roster of favorites?! Admittedly, I only know two or three of his songs. But (again!) my father liked listening to him and Mathis’ voice grew on me. I always mistake him for Nat King Cole. They sound the same to me. That is why I like them both.

Most of all, I love his song A Certain Smile

Years back, I watched an old movie with the same title. (One of the local networks had a month long feature of classic movies. You bet I didn’t miss a single one.) It is a love story set in France. Of course, the actors were all French except for one vaguely familiar name – Joan Fontaine. I think she was a famous Hollywood star.

Where was I? I am rambling.. Oh yes.

To my surprise (and pleasure!), Johnny Mathis himself made a special appearance in the movie and sang the song.

His song, nominated for Song of the Year during the 1958 Academy Awards, is a classic. The lyrics…Whew! And his voice..! You just have to hear him sing.

A certain smile, a certain face
Can lead an unsuspecting heart
On a merry chase
A fleeting glance can say
So many lovely things
Suddenly you know why my heart sings

You love awhile and when love goes
You try to hide the tears inside
With a cheerful pose

But in the hush of night
Exactly like a bitter sweet refrain
Comes that certain smile
To haunt your heart again

I used to only know the very first line and last four lines. That was enough for me. It had me at .. a certain smile.

When the heart hurts

I was watching one of my favorite shows when one line from one of the lead characters floored me. It went something like this -

“I am not just sad. I am broken.”

I blinked to fight the tears. Exactly how I feel.

I recently had a bitter argument with someone who means a lot to me. Sadly, I still don’t have the strength to confront the situation and mend the relationship.

Thinking about the strained relationship gives me a hollow feeling. A deep sadness. A certain brokenness. Writing about it still makes me cry.

Last weekend, I get a text message from a friend. “ I hope you can find a way to make things right…”

I am sure things will normalize but at this point, some pieces of my broken whole may take a while to find. And may take awhile to put back together.

I don’t go about my day long-faced and grouchy. I manage a genuine smile and give a hearty laugh every so often.

But sometimes, I do flash a smile that never reaches my eyes. Maybe sometimes, for a brief moment, I look down to hide a pained expression triggered by a memory.

"The mighty God will not despise
The contrite heart for sacrifice;
The deep-fetched sigh, the secret groan,
Rises accepted to the throne.
He meets, with tokens of his grace,
The trembling lip, the blushing face;
His bowels yearn when sinners pray;
And mercy bears their sins away.
When filled with grief, o'erwhelmed with shame;
He, pitying, heals their broken frame;
He hears their sad complaints, and spies
His image in their weeping eyes."